I realize now
by Apex Soldier
Summary: What I want you two to do is to scout and learn what you can about them." That was our mission but what if this mission will be our last? I don't want to lose her, not ever. Naruhina, small suicidal scene but not much... MAJOR FLUFF, mostly near the end.


**Yo! What's up! It's me, Angelito!**

**Yeah, got another story here... I hope it's good cuz it took a lot of creativity to make it... Etto, I think this is my fifth story in the last two hours? Yup, I suppose...**

**Keep in mind that this is supposed to be love type stories so I won't go into detail with violence... only if I want to or if it's necessary...**

**Please review and tell me what you think of it... Anways, on with the story!**

**I don't own Naruto...  
_P.S: This is my first attempt at first person point of view... please be nice..._**

* * *

Naruto Uzumaki and Hinata Hyuga, two different ninjas, two different minds, one general feeling. Love. Yes, Hinata Hyuga loves Naruto Uzumaki and Naruto Uzumaki loves Hinata Hyuga. The problem, Naruto doesn't know it yet. He was still having trouble understanding the whole concept of love. It took him seventeen years, but when he realized that he did not in fact love Sakura, his whole world went into chaos. He stayed in his apartment, never coming out, thinking about his life and where it was headed. At this point, he realized that even though he would get stronger, he'd grow old alone. Maybe not old but he would get lonely. Afraid of this outcome, he hurriedly ran out and started looking for some girls he might like.

**[Naruto...]**

I bumped into Ino and imagine my surprise when we started talking. Well, basically she did all the talking but I added a couple of comments myself. As she spoke, I realized she did look pretty but was very talkative and bossy. She's like a Sakura clone or something. What did I ever see in Sakura anyways? Oh, she stopped talking, wonder what happened.

"Are you even listening to me Naruto?" Ino asked me. I sweat dropped and laughed sheepishly, I really wasn't.

"Of course!" I said in my defense. She looked at me, not really believing me. She just scoffed and walked away. I was relieved, I don't think I could take her talking to me anymore. I shook my head and continued walking, hoping I would find some girl to like. Wasn't that how it worked? You would be walking down the street and for the first time you see a girl you like, you'd feel funny or something like that? Love is complicated, I wish it wasn't.

I kept walking down the street until I saw, or thought I saw, someone following me. I turned around but didn't see anyone there. I shrugged my shoulders and kept walking. I continually looked around but all the girls were either giving me glares, ignoring me, or were too young and old for me. I hung my head in disappointment and decided that I'll probably end up alone. As I walked, I heard a small voice call my name.

"N-Naruto-kun..." The small voice said behind me. I turned around and saw Hinata nervously looking at me. She was a very odd girl back then. She still is, but in a good way. She's different, she never hit me or yelled at me, only encouraged me. She also gave me this weird feeling ever since I got back from my training. When she looks at me with her pretty lavender eyes, I feel... warm inside. Or her long hair, she looks way better with long hair. That jacket though, what's up with that? Is she trying to hid something or is she always cold?

I wondered if she was the girl I should ask out but then again, she always hung out with Kiba. Did that mean that they were together? No, they're teammates and Kiba would probably be showing off and telling everyone of his relationship. But still, could I ask the Hyuga heiress out? Do I even like her? Does she even like me? Hinata started looking worried so I decided to answer her.

"Oh, uhm, yeah Hinata?" She looked at me and then down to the sidewalk.

"L-Lady Tsunade wants you f-for a mission." She said meekly. I wondered why she always shy around me. Around her teammates she was ok I guess but when I enter the picture, she stutters more and gets red in the face. Do I make her sick? Can people really be allergic to other people.

"Ok, see ya later Hinata." I told her but before I was able to run to the Hokage tower, she stopped me by placing her arm on my forearm. For some unknown reason, it had a calming effect. I suddenly didn't feel like running but walking... along with Hinata. I shook my thoughts out of my head.

"A-Actually, w-we have a mission... t-together." She said, her face getting a darker shade of red. She then lifted her hand out of my arm. the calming effect didn't leave, but it did weaken a bit.

"Ok, let's go then!" I said, my usual enthusiasm returning. Hinata giggled at this. It was the first time I ever heard her giggle, which I hope won't be the last time. As we walked to the Hokage Tower, there was silence between us. It wasn't the awkward silence but a peaceful one, one I enjoyed. It was funny how much inner joy and happiness I got from just being around Hinata. It was a nice change actually, maybe I should spend more time with Hinata.

**[Hinata...]**

I can't believe it, I'm walking beside Naruto-kun and I haven't fainted yet! It's a major accomplishment for me, no matter how small it is in the eyes of another. It seems odd that he hasn't said anything yet, but the peaceful silence is actually nice. I didn't know he could be so calm and quiet. He's usually so loud and enthusiastic. I wish I could be like that, then maybe he'd notice me.

But with this mission, maybe we'll spend more time together and maybe he'll even... Oh my! I'm getting ahead of myself again, need to relax. Breathe girl, breathe. So I started breathing, apparently too loud because Naruto-kun looked at me.

"Hinata, are you ok?" He asked me, seemingly worried.

"M-Me? Y-Yeah, just a little trouble breathing f-for a second." I lied. I hated lying, especially to Naruto-kun but I didn't want him to find out why I was really breathing hard. He seemed content with my answer so he continued to walk in silence. I was glad he dropped the subject. I really had no idea what I would say if he asked again.

When we finally reached the Hokage's tower, Naruto-kun and I saw a white haired man fly out the Hokage's window. Naruto-kun muttered something incoherent before walking into the building. As we entered the Hokage's office, Lady Tsunade seemed agitated and upset. It was never good news when she was in this state. She would get irrational and sometimes hurt my Naruto-kun...

Did I say _my_ Naruto-kun? I meant just Naruto-kun. Anyways, Lady Tsunade looked up when she heard the door open. I always wondered how Naruto-kun could just walk into the Hokage's office without knocking. It was very unusual for a ninja serving under her to do this and if they did, they usualy had their head ripped off because they were disturbing her. Naruto-kun just walked up to the Hokage's desk and sat down on the chair in front of the desk. I quietly made my way over to the Hokage and bowed before sitting down.

"Now," she started, "I've called you both in here today because I have a mission for both of you. There has been bandits terrorizing towns just outside of the village. Usually the towns local authorities would handle the situation but a witness informed us that the bandits were being lead by two rogue ninjas. Not much is known about these missing nins except that they are from Hidden Mist. What I want you two to do is to scout for them and learn what you can about them. Hinata, I asked for you because you could use your byakugan to watch them from a safe distance. Naruto, you're there just in case things get hairy. I don't want you to confront these rogue ninjas, if anything I don't want you to fight them unless it's absolutely necessary. Is that understood?"

I saw Naruto-kun nod his head, I nodded my head soon after.

"Good, now go get ready, I want you two to watch them for at least a week so prepare accordingly." Naruto-kun and I nodded and we left to get ready.

After I got my stuff ready, I waited for Naruto-kun to show up at the front gates of the village. I shuffled my feet and played with my hair as I waited, hoping everything would go well in this mission.

**[Naruto...]**

I was walking to the front gates, for some reason, thinking about Hinata. Why shouldn't I ask her out, she's a pretty girl and nice and has nice eyes...

I was snapped out of my thoughts when I saw Hinata sitting on the bench.

She was shuffling her feet as she sat on the bench, kicking the dust under her up. She had her eyes closed, seeming to be thinking about something. She was twisting her hair in her finger, making it shine as it moved. She was wearing her usual jacket and pants but something seemed different about her. I don't know what it was but I liked it. I walked up to her and gave her the biggest smile I could make. Apparantly, it was big enough because she smiled back.

"You ready Hinata-chan?" _Chan? Where did that come from? Since when did I add the -chan?'_

"Y-Yeah N-Naruto-kun." She replied. I shook my thoughts out of my head and smiled. We then started heading off to the direction of the town where the rogue ninjas were terrorizing. After walking for about five minutes, I had to go to the bathroom badly! I looked around, looking for a good place to go to. I stopped running and so did Hinata-chan. She seemed worried about something.

"Naruto-kun, a-are you ok?" She asked. I smiled, I didn't really know how to say that I had to pee without sounding stupid.

"I, uh, gotta go to the bathroom. Just wait here." I said as I made a mad dash for a tree far away enough from Hinata-chan. After I was done, I walked back to where I last saw Hinata-chan and saw her sitting under a tree. She was humming a tune to a song and I suddenly stopped. It sounded so nice that I didn't want to make her stop. I wanted to get closer so I could hear her better but unfortunately, my foot went under a root and I tripped. I fell face first into the dirt and ate some too.

I heard Hinata-chan stand and walk over to where I was. I looked up and saw her put her hands over her mouth and gasp.

"N-Naruto-kun... are you o-ok?" She asked me. I quickly got up and rubbed the back of my head sheepishly.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just tripped I guess but I'm still alive." I laughed a little hoping to relieve her of her worry. She seemed to calm down before noticing something.

"Naruto-kun, you s-seemed to have h-hurt yourself." I tilted my head and looked at her strangely.

"What do you mean?" I asked her. She walked closer to me while she took out some tissues and bandages out of her pouch on her right leg. She dabbed the tissue on my head which apparently cleaned some of the blood off of my head and then forced my head lower. She continued to clean my cut but didn't noticed where she placed my head.

"H-Hinata-chan?" I asked nervously while I blushed. She didn't seem to hear me but in some way, I was glad. I tried to refrain myself from doing it, but I couldn't help myself. In my position, I could see... well most of her cleavage. It was odd that she had her sweater almost fully zipped but I was some how able to see down it anyways. My blush intensified at this thought and I let out a sigh of relief when she finished bandaging my head.

I looked at her and smiled. She was a pretty good nurse. A thought suddenly came into my head and I cursed the perverted hermit of a sensei I had for giving me such a perverted mind. I shook the image of a nurse Hinata-chan out of my mind and walked up to Hinata-chan.

"Anyways, we should keep going." I said, not really sure of what else to say. She just nodded her head and we were on our way to the town. The town wasn't as far as I thought it was and I saw a bunch of bandits running out of a store holding supplies and food they took from the store. I clenched my fist as I watched them run for their base. I wanted to beat the crap out of them but Hinata-chan's hand held me back.

"I-I know you're angry N-Naruto-kun but remember, we can't c-confront the rogue ninjas. I know t-they're probably not the rogues b-but if we attack them, t-then the rogue ninjas will s-suspect something. We must first scout them out, l-like Hokage-sama said." Hinata-chan told me. I really didn't want to just sit around and watch a bunch of bandits and rogues do... whatever it is they do. Of course I wanted to argue but the calming effect stopped me and I took in a deep breath.

**[Hinata...]**

"Ok Hinata-chan, we'll do this your way." I heard Naruto-kun say. I smiled at him and patted his arm. I let my arm drop back at my side and then he nodded at me. I nodded back and we both headed for the bandits that ran away with the stolen items.

**[*.*.*.*]**

It's been three days and we learned very little of the rogues we were sent to scout. I learned that one rogue was a female and the other was a male. It seemed that, in front of the army, the male was in charge but sometimes, the female seemed to tell the male what to do. This intrigued me but not by much. During our time together, me and Naruto-kun have gotten along.

I learned that while he can be loud and talkative, he could also be quiet and was a great listener. He made me talk about myself once and it turned into a conversation of my past, my horrible past. I might be exaggerating a little but my childhood wasn't as grand as Naruto-kun thought it was. By the time I finished, he was so amazed that he was speechless.

I knew this would happen though, I knew I would love Naruto-kun even more now that I've spent more time with him. I knew that I would be happy with Naruto-kun, for all my life. Though just because I think so, doesn't mean he does.

Lately, his been quiet, even when we're not supposed to be. He seems to be thinking over something, like he's mentally deciding something but he can't decide. I want to help him out but whenever I ask, he stutters a little and I think blushes. That could be my imagination, though. I have never known Naruto-kun to blush, even when Sakura was around.

Today, Naruto-kun went into town to get some supplies for us and I decided to stay, I was too tired to go anyways. Naruto-kun, Naruto-kun, Naruto-kun... Every thought of mine revolves around him in some way, no matter how small. It only goes to show how much he means to me.

I shook my head, clearing my thoughts and let the quietness of the forest calm me. I shot off the floor and activated my Byakugan. It was too quiet, it was very suspicious to me. I rolled to the side, avoiding kunai and shuriken that were rushing to pierce my skin. I quickly recovered and saw the female rogue standing on the opposite side of the field from me. She had green hair that reached her shoulders. She wore a tattered pale red shirt and dark brown capris.

"So you're the ninja that's been watching over me and Daisuke for the last three days. You guys have been getting on my nerves the last few days and now I finally get to end it." She told me and I got into my family's stance. The rogue laughed at me.

"Nice try but I'll end this soon enough." She said as she disappeared from my sight. This is where it all went down hill for me...

**[Naruto...]**

I ran through the trees, not caring if the rogue ninja was dead or not. After I got the supplies I told Hinata-chan I'd get, I was ambushed by the stupid bandits. It didn't take long for me to finish them off but then again, it didn't take long for the male rogue to show up either. We fought a long and hard battle. I guess I won since Kyuubi took control long enough to rip the rogue's left arm off.

I wasn't worried after that, until he told me of the other rogue who went after Hinata-chan. Now I raced down the road, praying that I wasn't too late. I went straight through the forest, dodging various bushes and roots. I then jumped over a branch over me and looked around. I had to find her, I just had to! It had taken me some time to decide that Hinata-chan is the girl for me. I really do like her, a lot even, and in the short amount of time we've been together, I can feel the special bond I've made with her. Now, I could be losing the bond I worked so hard to gain.

_'Damn it, go faster!' _I thought._ 'When did the mission get to this point? Where I could lose Hinata-chan, the girl I... love?'_

I soon saw her laying on the ground and ran over to her. I saw the other rogue's body and she seemed lifeless. It seemed like Hianta can hold her own against the rogue until I looked at her more closely.

Her blood was spilling out of her left leg and mid section. I fell to my knees and saw her barely holding on to consciousness. She looked directly at me and smiled. I felt tears stinging my eyes and tried my best to restrain them but they were being stubborn.

"Hey..." She said weakly, coughing up a little blood. "D-Don't be sad."

"How can I not be when you're in this state?" I asked her, smiling mirthlessly and letting my tears fall. My vision momentarily blurred because of my tears. I then saw her try to wipe my tears away. Her arm struggled to get up to my face but I just grabbed it. She seemed shocked for a second before making her smile return.

"But I'm fine with it. I-I had a good life and m-met wonderful p-people I'm proud to call my f-friends."

"But I'm not ok with it, Hinata-chan and stop talking like you're dying!" I yelled, every second that passes makes it harder for me to speak. My voice was cracking and my breaths were getting shorter. I felt like I was going to die just like she was.

"Why?" She asked me, a small tear escaping her eye. I gulped loudly and looked at her serious.

"Because I... I..." It was hard for me to say it but I had to. "Because I realize now..." I continued and closed my eyes. "That I love you." I reopened my eyes and saw that Hinata had her eyes closed. I panicked and softly shook her.

"H-Hinata-chan... P-Please, don't die..." I said, my tears falling more freely. "I need you here... with me. I love you... don't leave me alone... not again." I said as I cried into her shoulder. She couldn't be gone, not Hinata-chan? Why? Why was the world taking away the things that meant everything to me? After a minute of my dispair. I stood up, picking Hinata-chan up with me.

"I'm not giving up... You will survive Hinata-chan. If you don't..." I didn't finish my sentence and just started running for the Konoha.

**[???...]**

I slowly fluttered my eyes open as I let the sounds of the world enter my ears. I heard beeping and some shoes tapping on the floor. I also heard some light snoring and writing. I felt something laying on top of my left leg, it was heavy but not enough to directly bother me. I completely opened my eyes, still groggy from my sleep and everything was still blurry. From what I could make out, I was in a white room and something yellow was on my leg.

After my vision recovered, I saw a nurse smiling at me.

"How are you?" She asked as I instinctively smiled back.

"Good I-I guess." I answered. I looked down and couldn't help the gasp that escaped my lips. "N-Naruto-kun?" The nurse looked at Naruto before looking at me again.

"Ah yes, the young man; he's a very stubborn man. The only times he left your side was when he had to go to the bathroom and when Lady Tsunade gave him missions. He usually sent clones to do the missions but Lady Tsunade caught on soon enough and forced him out. He would sometimes complain but he didn't even leave to get food. He would eat the hospital's food, even though I agree with him, it's not the best food in the world." The nurse told me, saying the last part with a wink. I giggled a little and looked at Naruto again. A warm smile apppeared on my face as I thought about what the nurse just told me.

"You're very lucky to have someone as dedicated as him by your side. There have been many times when they thought of letting you rest permanently since you didn't seem to wake anytime soon but this young man wouldn't hear of it. He threatened the doctors, nurse, tempts, even Lady Tsunade herself, from what I heard. He told them that if you were harmed in any way, he would have something to say." I looked at Naruto-kun incredulous, then at the nurse.

"How long was I out for?" I asked, amazed I didn't stutter.

"You've been unconscious for about five months. You lost a lot of blood and it didn't help that you had a concussion. I'd love to talk some more but I am needed in the next room. Nice talking to you, I'll let the doctors and Lady Tsunade know that you have awaken." I saw the nurse leave and then turned my attention to Naruto-kun. I then remembered the last thing he said to me before I lost consciousness.

_"Because I realize now..."_

I wondered what he was going to tell me, I was even tempted to wake him up and ask. I decided against it after seeing his peaceful expression.

"Hinata... chan..." I heard him say sleepily. I was shocked for a minute. Apparently he was dreaming about me, but about what? I blushed a dark red and shook my head from those thoughts. I am a Hyuga and therefore shouldn't have such thoughts. I sighed and tried to get up to use the bathroom but as soon as my left leg moved, Naruto-kun immediately woke up and held my leg down gently but firmly.

"You're not taking her..." He looked around and saw me looking at him. Now I was really curious as to what he was dreaming about. Or did he think that they were going to put me to rest?

"Hinata-chan? Are you really awake or am I dreaming again?" I heard him ask and couldn't resist giggling.

"Y-Yes Naruto-kun... I'm real." I answered, cursing my stuttering. He smiled and hugged me tightly. I don't think I've ever been this close to him, ever! I was so happy that I barely heard what Naruto-kun was saying.

"... And they wanted to give up but I told them that they shouldn't, that you'd wake up soon and you did! I'm glad your ok Hinata-chan." Naruto-kun rambled. I felt something wet fall on my shoulder. I looked at my shoulder and saw Naruto-kun silently crying. It wasn't much but some tears still fell down his cheek.

"I... I thought I lost you Hinata-chan. You have no idea how much you mean to me." I heard him whisper. I don't think he wanted me to hear him, but I did. I have never been so shocked as I was right now.

_'He... He said I have no idea how much I mean to him. Does this mean...?'_ I gently pushed him off me, enough so I could see his face.

"I... I mean something t-to you?" I asked him, not trying to get too hopeful. His face looked confused before realization hit him. He looked away, he seemed to be ashamed of something.

"Well... yeah. You mean a lot to me." He confessed. I again looked at him incredulous, this was almost as good as a confession, almost. And again, he surprised me.

"You can even say that I... that I love you." He said, making me go into shock. The boy I love, Naruto Uzumaki, loves me back! It was almost too good to be true. He looked at me expectantly and I opened my mouth... only to close it again. I saw a disappointed look on his face and I wanted to kick myself for not saying something.

**[Naruto...]**

I can't say I'm not surprised that she hasn't said anything yet, though I can say it hurts like hell. I knew what I was getting myself into by admitting my feelings to her... again. I just wasn't expecting her rejection to hurt so much.

She opened her mouth again but no words came out. Was she trying to let me down gently? I waited for her to say something but because of my lack of patience, it didn't take long for me to say something.

"I-It's ok Hinata... you don't have to say anything, I get it." I stood up and tried to not cry. So far, I was failing. "I'm, just glad that you're ok." I said before walking to the door and leaving it. I walked down the hall and glumly made my way home. When I got home, I sat on my bed and fell back. I let a few tears escape before I closed my eyes and wished the pain away as sleep claimed me at least.

**[*.*.*.*]**

It's been a week and I haven't seen Hinata-chan... I mean Hinata anywhere. I think they said they'd let her out three days after she woke up but I'm not sure. I was kind of getting worried. I talked to Kiba and Shino and they said that she was still in the hospital. So that's where I'm going now, to the hospital. I shivered, hating the thought of visiting the hospital. It was always so gloomy and depressing and their food... SUCKS! I mean, where would you place gray paste on the food pyramind? At the bottom, where no one can find it.

I entered the hospital and walked up to the nurse working at the desk. She smiled at me before asking me:

"How may I help you?" She asked.

"Yeah I'm here to visit a friend, her name's Hinata Hyuga." The nurse's smile disappeared and she shook her head.

"I'm sorry dear but you can't visit her." She told me, shocking me.

"Why not?"

"She's under suicide watch right now. We can't let her have any visitors, only doctors, nurses and the Hokage." My eyes widened and I left the hospital without saying a word.

_'Suicide...'_ That word echoing in my head. _'There's just no way.'_

**[Hinata...]**

I sat quietly as the nurse cleaned the room I was in. Two ANBU were standing at my door outside and I couldn't care less. Naruto-kun thinks I don't love him back; that's all I can think about. A day before I was scheduled to leave, I tried to hurt myself... badly. But before I could do that, I thought about what Naruto might think of me. After that, I gave up on that idea and decided that the second I was allowed to leave, I'd look for Naruto-kun.

Unfortunately, I was still in a very compromising position when doctors and nurses found me. I told them I wasn't planning on doing it but they didn't believe. Now five days later, I'm still under suicide watch, wondering what Naruto-kun is doing and hoping he doesn't hear about my little stunt.

When the nurse leaves, about two minutes later, I hear something moving out my window. I looked at the clock beside my bed and see that it's after two in the morning. I would've gotten up to see what or who was outside but I was strapped down to my bed. I see my window open and Naruto-kun looking around.

"N-Naruto-kun?" I say, getting his attention. He walked over me and hugged me.

"Hinata-chan, are you ok?" He asked me. I nodded and then he pulled back to look at me. "Don't you ever do something like that again, you hear me?" He said. I was confused before realizing that he was talking about the misunderstanding. I nod my head and he sighs a breath of relief.

"N-Naruto-kun... I have something... I want to tell you." This is it, what I've been wanting to tell him for over eight years. "Well... Y-You told me that... y-you loved me a week ago. Is that true, d-do you mean it?" I asked.

"Yes, I do." He told me, his confidence backing up his answer.

"I-I'm sorry..." My stuttering made me speak too slowly that when Naruto-kun heard that, he looked cresent fallen. But before he could say anything, I spoke up again. "I'm sorry you love someone so weak. Who was too weak to tell you... I love you too." I said. He looked shocked, this was probably the last thing he expected me to say.

"You... love me too?" I nodded my head. "But I don't love a weak person. I love you. You're the strongest kunoichi I know and there's nothing anyone, even you, can say to change my mind about that." He told me. It really touched my heart that he thought I was strong.

"Please don't ever call yourself weak again. Don't say bad things about yourself because they're not true. I know you Hinata-chan and I know you're strong and nice and beautiful and so much more." He told me. I blushed and Naruto-kun smiled at me. I tried to supress a yawn and Naruto-kun chuckled.

"Looks like someone's sleepy." I smiled and nodded my head. "Maybe you should go to sleep." I nodded my head and then he unstrapped the belts, picked me up, laid down where I was just at, and put me over him, the covers covering the both of us.

"N-Naruto-kun?" I asked nervously, unsure if he should be here. "Are you s-sure? If you get caught, w-won't you get in t-trouble?" I asked and he just scoffed while he held me close.

"I always get in trouble anyways, besides, I want to be near you." He told me with a wink. My blush intensified and I giggled. We looked at each other and our faces seemed to be getting closer to each other because soon enough, we both shared our first kiss. Not technically since Sasuke beat me to it, but our first kiss together. I smiled under the kiss and so did he. When we parted, I let my head rest on his chest and heard his heart beat.

"Goodnight Naruto-kun." I said before letting the darkness consume me. Before I lost consciousness, I heard Naruto say:

"Goodnight, Hinata-chan."

* * *

**So was it good? Enjoyable? Let me know so I could know what to fix and how to improve...**

**Please review, sometimes I think that people don't like this a lot... It'd really help a lot...**

**Again, sorry for the lack of violence, it's a love story, not a gore filled one... And sorry for the suicidal Hinata, at least she stopped herself before she actually did it right? *Sigh*, I didn't really want a suicidal Hinata but I kind of needed her to be just a little, don't be mad...**

**Well, that's it, until next time...**

**Good luck with whatever and if you got a problem with me or one of my stories, please feel free to: Deal with it, Get over it or Choke on it...**


End file.
